Aaron Keuper

I feel better this week than I have in a long long time.

Energy levels are up, but unfortunately I’ve noticed (and so have some of my co-workers) that I’ve gained quite a bit of weight. Some of that is due to the “new girlfriend” comfort zone of eating out, snuggling, and fucking my eyeballs out. But some of that is just due to sheer laziness, and some latent depression.

I know what I need to do, but I haven’t managed to work up the resolve to do it.

Things I’m working on:

• Writing every day
• Writing a D&D 4e campaign
• Leveling my Priest to level 80 (World of Warcraft)
• Need to file some back taxes (Oy, I know I’m gonna owe!)
• Need to remember my Dental appt on 06/30/2008
• Need to write more
• Oh and I’m thinking of filing Bankruptcy but this is gonna take a little while to get done, and isn’t on the top of my list of things to do – OBVIOUSLY

Today I feel different – I feel unmotivated still — much as I have for the last few weeks, but I also feel slightly less opressed than I did yesterday.

Sort of like when you first wake up and you lift your head and squint through your eye boogers. You’re awake now, but you don’t want to be.

I take this to be a good thing, though I’m longing to be MORE awake and have more focus.

This is Day #2 of trying to write something everyday.

I’m feeling really sluggish today, it’s hard for me to get much done lately and I just want to sleep. My girlfriend thinks I might be getting depressed, and saying it that way makes me feel like it’s similar to coming down with a cold.

I know I deperately need to find my motivation — misplaced like an odd set of keys or a pen gone missing; it’s just that in order to find my missing motivation, I’ll need some of said motivation.

*sigh* Conundrum.